A guide to selecting the perfect number of bridesmaids for your wedding
Once you get engaged and start envisioning how your wedding celebration will look, one of the first questions that may spring to mind is: How many bridesmaids can you have? Having close confidantes in your bridal party can be an extremely special part of your wedding, but deciding the exact number of friends to stand by your side as you attend all your pre-wedding events and walk down the aisle can be a tricky balance to achieve. You likely don’t want to exclude certain friends or family members from your party, but equally don’t want to have an absurdly long line of bridesmaids at the altar à la the finale of 27 Dresses.
Ahead, we break down some tips to determine what the sweet spot is when determining how many people are right for your wedding party.
How many bridesmaids should you have?
First of all, there is no right number of bridesmaids you can have in your wedding party. The decision to have someone stand by your side with you on your wedding day is entirely based on your own preferences. You can have one bridesmaid, five, or even 18. Some brides choose to have only a maid of honour, and let their other friends know they are still an important part of their celebration by having them all join for a bachelorette party. In some cases, couples have asked all of their friends attending to consider themselves part of the wedding party and wear outfits according to a specific dress code. The gist? It really is up to you.
What is the average number of bridesmaids?
Even if you’re aware you can do your own thing, you might be curious how many bridesmaids typically make up a bridal party. According to a 2023 study by The Knot, the average number of bridesmaids in a wedding was four people. This amount of bridesmaids is not indicative of what your party should look like, but there’s no denying it’s a sensible amount. Selecting four people offers you a nice circle of friends by your side to get ready for your celebration and to cover any necessary planning tasks, but not so many that it would get crowded if they stand with you at the altar.
How many bridesmaids is too many?
While there really is no limit to the number of bridesmaids you can have in your wedding party, you might want to think about the logistics of having a larger group. If you plan to cover the costs of hair and makeup of your bridesmaids, that price tag can go up exponentially with a bigger party. You also will likely need to find locations with a large capacity for any pre-wedding events like bridesmaid luncheons and bachelorette parties. Remember, making multiple lunch and dinner reservations for six people is way easier than for 16.
When choosing the number of bridesmaids in your own party, you will also want to think about the number of people in your fiancé’s wedding party. While they don’t have to match exactly, it might feel a bit off if you have 10 bridesmaids and they only have two. As you and your partner are figuring out both of your wedding parties, try to find a balance between the two. It’s okay if you have three more people in your party if you have a larger group of super close friends, but try not to push it too far.
How to choose bridesmaids
When choosing who will be a bridesmaid, man, or mate at your celebration, think about the most important people in your life that you want to join in for the ride. Asking someone to be in your bridal party is considered a major honour, so you want to take this decision seriously. Consider if you want them present for your bachelorette party, rehearsal dinner, bridal showers, and the morning when you get ready for the wedding, as well as making an appearance in wedding photos you’ll look at years in the future.
Since being in a bridal party is a commitment of both time and money, you will want to think about who would be willing to spend those resources for you. Siblings and other close family members are always great potential bridal party members, but don’t feel obligated to choose someone in your family if you don’t have a great relationship with them. Best friends and other super close friends in your circle should absolutely be on your list of potential bridesmaids as well.
When you finalize your list, come up with a good way to ask your friends and family to join the bridal party. Giving a small gift and a handwritten note is always a kind gesture. If you’re local, definitely make the effort to ask in person. If not, you can mail a package to your potential bridesmaids, bridesmen, and bridesmates and follow up with a phone call or FaceTime when they receive it.
What if I don’t want bridesmaids?
Don’t want to have any bridesmaids at your wedding? No problem. It’s absolutely acceptable for you and your spouse to eschew having a wedding party at your wedding. In fact, going down the aisle sans bridesmaids is a much more common trend in recent years. So if you don’t want to ask anyone to join your bridal party? Simply go ahead and remove that task from your planning list.
Original article appeared on Vogue Us